SHUT UP !!

*sigh* so when i get a point of view that i don't wanna hear, i jump straight into defense mode. .which was the case EARLY this morning. .first of all, im not a morning person ! i let that go cuz this is someone i care about. .i couldn't do anything but sit on the phone and take it because i didn't want him thinking my defense mode was putting a wall up to {what he calls} the obvious. .honestly, im just a naturally argumentative person && that has always been my downfall. .i will admit, i DON'T like hearing someone on the outside telling me the truth, especially if im in avoidance of it.

long story short, it was my current boyfriend telling me that im not over my ex-boyfriend. .which i TOTALLY am !

the funny thing was that im listening to this account of why he thinks so, but i have nothing to argue back. .it was as if. .NO, I LOST !

ha. .thats another problem that i have, i can't take criticism. .i always have to argue my point && feel like i won or had the last word. .but in this case, i didn't. .after he finished making his point though, he told me how he felt about me and went back to normal conversation.

what i loved though, was that during the conversation {WELL WHILE HE WAS TALKING, CUZ HE WAS THE DOMINANT ONE} he continued to tell me "babe, this is me telling you this as a man, and NOT as your man". .he has grown to become a confidant, a friend, and a lover. we can always talk about anything && everything. .@ that point though, i felt that he called my bluff and all i wanted to do was tell him to SHUT UP ! but he was right and i was wrong && after he made me see that. .

I WAS PISSED !!!

but now that im letting it out this CONSTRUCTIVE way, i feel better. .AS MUCH AS I WANNA CALL HIM BACK TO ARGUE MY POINT, IT KINDA JUST FURTHERS HIS POINT && I NEED TO GET OVER IT. .

wooooooooooo sahhhhhhhhhh. .IM OVER IT ! THANKS FOR LISTNIN. .nowwwwww

With Love,
Riyya Ai'sha